What Is Cyberbullying?

Quick Answer

Cyberbullying is bullying that happens online or through phones and devices. It includes sending mean messages, posting hurtful things about someone on social media, sharing embarrassing photos without permission, or leaving someone out of online groups on purpose. Unlike in-person bullying, cyberbullying can follow you home and happen at any hour.

See How This Explanation Changes By Age

Age 4

You know how sometimes people are mean to each other at school or on the playground? Well, people can also be mean to each other on phones and computers. When someone uses a phone, tablet, or computer to be mean to someone else, that's called cyberbullying.

Cyberbullying might be sending a mean message to someone, or posting something hurtful where other people can see it. It's like name-calling, but instead of saying it out loud, the person types it on a screen.

Cyberbullying is just as hurtful as being mean in person. Words on a screen can make someone feel just as sad as words said out loud. Nobody should use a phone or computer to be mean to other people.

If you ever see something mean on a screen, or if someone sends you something that makes you feel bad, tell a grown-up right away. Your mommy, daddy, or teacher can help. You should never have to deal with mean messages by yourself.

Explaining By Age Group

Ages 3-5 Simple Explanation

You know how sometimes people are mean to each other at school or on the playground? Well, people can also be mean to each other on phones and computers. When someone uses a phone, tablet, or computer to be mean to someone else, that's called cyberbullying.

Cyberbullying might be sending a mean message to someone, or posting something hurtful where other people can see it. It's like name-calling, but instead of saying it out loud, the person types it on a screen.

Cyberbullying is just as hurtful as being mean in person. Words on a screen can make someone feel just as sad as words said out loud. Nobody should use a phone or computer to be mean to other people.

If you ever see something mean on a screen, or if someone sends you something that makes you feel bad, tell a grown-up right away. Your mommy, daddy, or teacher can help. You should never have to deal with mean messages by yourself.

Ages 6-8 More Detail

You probably already know what bullying is -- when someone is mean to the same person over and over. Cyberbullying is the same thing, but it happens online. It can happen on phones, tablets, computers, gaming systems, or anywhere people communicate through screens.

Cyberbullying can look like a lot of different things. Someone might send mean texts or messages. They might post embarrassing pictures or videos of someone. They might start a group chat and talk badly about someone, or they might leave someone out of online groups on purpose.

One thing that makes cyberbullying extra hard is that it can happen anytime, anywhere. Regular bullying usually stops when you leave school. But cyberbullying can follow you home, pop up at night, and even happen on weekends. It can feel like there's no escape.

Another tough thing is that online posts can spread fast. A mean comment in the hallway is heard by a few people. A mean post online can be seen by hundreds of kids. That makes it even more hurtful.

If someone is cyberbullying you, don't reply to them. Save the messages or take screenshots as proof, and show them to a parent or trusted adult right away. Most apps and websites have ways to block and report someone who is being mean. You don't have to handle this alone.

Ages 9-12 Full Explanation

Cyberbullying is the use of technology -- phones, social media, gaming platforms, messaging apps -- to bully someone. It includes sending threatening or mean messages, spreading rumors online, sharing embarrassing photos or videos, creating fake accounts to mock someone, or deliberately excluding someone from online groups.

What makes cyberbullying different from in-person bullying is its reach and permanence. A mean comment in the hallway is heard and then it's gone. But a mean post online can be screenshot, shared, and seen by thousands of people. Even if the post is deleted, copies might already exist. The internet has a long memory.

Cyberbullying also removes the face-to-face element. When you can see someone's face and watch them get hurt, most people feel bad and stop. But behind a screen, people say things they'd never say in person. The distance makes some people bolder and crueler than they'd be face to face.

Another problem is that cyberbullying doesn't stop at the school door. It follows you home, shows up on your phone at midnight, and can invade every space that used to feel safe. For the person being targeted, it can feel like there's absolutely nowhere to go to get away from it.

If you're experiencing cyberbullying, here's what to do: don't respond to the bully, because that often encourages them. Take screenshots of everything -- these are your evidence. Block the person on whatever platform they're using. And tell a trusted adult, whether that's a parent, teacher, or school counselor. Most social media platforms also have reporting tools for harassment.

If you see cyberbullying happening to someone else, don't pile on and don't just scroll past. You can privately message the person being targeted to let them know you support them. You can report the bullying post. And you can refuse to share or laugh at content that's designed to hurt someone. Being a good person online takes the same effort as being one in real life.

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Tips for Parents

Cyberbullying can be a challenging topic to discuss with your child. Here are some practical tips to help guide the conversation:

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DO: Follow your child's lead. Let them ask questions at their own pace rather than overwhelming them with information they haven't asked for yet. If they seem satisfied with a simple answer, that's okay — they'll come back with more questions when they're ready.

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DO: Use honest, age-appropriate language. You don't need to share every detail, but avoid making up stories or deflecting. Kids can sense when you're being evasive, and honesty builds trust.

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DO: Validate their feelings. Whatever emotion your child has in response to learning about cyberbullying, acknowledge it. Say things like 'It makes sense that you'd feel that way' or 'That's a really good question.'

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DON'T: Don't dismiss their curiosity. Responses like 'You're too young for that' or 'Don't worry about it' can make children feel like their questions are wrong or shameful. If you're not ready to answer, say 'That's an important question. Let me think about the best way to explain it, and we'll talk about it tonight.'

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DO: Create an ongoing dialogue. One conversation usually isn't enough. Let your child know that they can always come back to you with more questions about cyberbullying. This makes them more likely to come to you rather than seeking potentially unreliable sources.

Common Follow-Up Questions Kids Ask

After discussing cyberbullying, your child might also ask:

What counts as cyberbullying versus just drama?

Cyberbullying is repeated, intentional, and targets a specific person. If someone posts one snarky comment during an argument, that's drama. If someone repeatedly sends threatening messages, creates hate pages, or consistently targets someone online, that's cyberbullying. The pattern is what makes the difference.

Can you get in trouble for cyberbullying?

Yes. Many schools have rules against cyberbullying even when it happens outside school hours, because it affects the school environment. In serious cases, cyberbullying can even lead to legal consequences. Some states have specific laws against it, especially when it involves threats or harassment.

What if someone cyberbullies me anonymously?

Even anonymous accounts can often be traced. Save all the evidence -- screenshots of messages, usernames, dates, and times. Report the account to the platform. Tell an adult. In serious cases, law enforcement can work with tech companies to identify who's behind anonymous accounts.

Should I just stay off social media to avoid cyberbullying?

You shouldn't have to give up technology because someone else is being cruel. The problem isn't you being online -- it's the bully's behavior. Instead, learn how to use privacy settings, block people, and report harassment. Having a trusted adult you can talk to about your online life also helps a lot.

What if the cyberbully goes to my school?

If the person cyberbullying you is a classmate, tell your school. Most schools take cyberbullying seriously, even when it happens outside of school. They can talk to the student, involve parents, and create a safety plan. Bring your screenshots as evidence so the school can see exactly what happened.

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